Troll Humor

      

More troll fun

(added in December 2006, Written by Martin Calderwood)

 

Here are a dozen more fun Trollinitions.  Remember the more of these you understand the better you will be able to communicate with the Trolls you might meet wondering around in the night.  As usual the 'English' equivalent is provided at the end.

 

Trolloween:  A day Trolls dress up in disguise and/or can go out at night among humans without standing out too much celebrated on October 31st. (Halloween)

 

Troll or Treat:  What young Trolls do while celebrating Trolloween.  Warning to Humans, it is better to give someone dressed as a Troll a few extra treats because if it is a real troll you do not want a Troll trick played on you for being stingy. (Trick or Treat) 

 

Trollibration:  A festive Troll activity held for a variety of reasons not the least of which is because they just want to. (Celebration)

 

Trollopoly:  A favorite game played by trolls who try to buy up the most troll caves, underground gardens and mineral mines to become the richest most greedy troll in the end. (Monopoly)

 

Trollicious:  Very tasty to a troll (Delicious)

 

'CTR'  Cardiac Trollminary Resuscitation:  Stomping or jumping on a Troll's chest to restart its heart. (Alternate method, hitting with a heavy wooden club several times.)  (Sometimes called TTT for Trolldiac, Trollminary Trollsusatation) (CPR)

 

Trollegiance:  Troll Loyalty (Allegiance )

 

Trollagory:  A story with a moral using a troll as a major character ( Allegory)

 

Trollscillations:  Vibrations or movement in the ground or area caused by a large troll moving nearby.  (Oscillations)

 

Rehabilitrolltions: When a troll 'goes bad' he or she is sent through Rehabilitrolltion to set him or her right again. (Rehabilitation)

 

Trollucinations:  When a Troll accidentally eats bad mushrooms or gets a high fever they sometimes see things that are not there.  These are called Trollucinations. (Hallucinations)

 

Trolltection:  When you have a Troll body guard he keeps you save by providing Trolltecton at all times. (Protection)

 

 

 

Here are a few editions to our collection of troll humor published in 2004..  These are also written by our Master Trollologist, Martin Calderwood.  We hope you enjoy these fun plays on words and jokes.

 

TROLLINITIONS

1)  Anytime a troll child is naughty a large adult will punish him or her.  This is known as being in the 'Big Trollble' . (trouble)

2) A Troll who travels of the country telling stories and singing songs for his keep is called a Trollbador. (Troubadour)

3) A very unique troll is said to be ' One in a tarollion' . (trillion)

4) The favorite ride in a Troll Amusement Park is the 'Trollercoaster'. (rollercoaster)

5) If a female Troll asks you want you like about her she is ' trolling' for compliments.

6) When you look at the inside of a Troll using a camera or scope you are giving him or her a 'trollenoscopy'.

7) An all-day sucker eaten by a Troll Is called a 'Trollipop'. (Lollipop)

8) When Trolls yodel they say 'Trolldaladywho'.  (yodaladyhoo)

9) A big twisting wind caused by a troll him is called a 'Trollnado'. (tornado)

10) Troll's have first level schooling at a 'Trollementary School' (Elementary)

 

 

TROLL HUMOR

1)   Vlad Troll: Where do Troll Vampires live.

      Drac Troll: Trollsavania, of course.

 

 

2)   Rok: Troll: “Where are Troll movies made?”

      Stony Troll: “Trollywood!”

 

 

3) Q.   What are a Trolls favorite Shows to watch on Trollovision?”

     A.   The Trollve o’clock news, For Whom the Bell Trolls, Trolling for Dollars, and naturally anything featuring the Norwegian Trolls Sports  Team!

 

4)        Zrok: “Do Trolls celebrate Christmas?”

            Brap: “Yes, mostly because of Carol.”

Zrok: “Carol?  Who’s Carol?”

Brap: “Carol Troll.”

Zrok: “Yes, in the song “Deck The Halls”.

Brap:  “Oh yes, Troll the Ancient Yuletide Carol.”

 

5)       “What would we ride on if we visited San Francisco?” asked the little girl Troll.

“Why the Troll-ey car of course.” replied Pa Troll

 

 

6)       Riddle.

           What famous play involving Trolls do these two words represent? 

                                                Equal, emaciated

           Pier Gaunt

 

7)        Troll Boy: “I learned my first human words today!”

Mama Troll: “Oh?  What were they?”

Troll Boy: “Eeeeek, a Troll!  What does that mean?”

Mama Troll: “He said, “Go away!  I’m not ready to be around you!  Now help me fix dinner.”

Troll Boy: “Eeeeek, a Troll!”

 

8)      What is the difference between a Troll born North of the Arctic Circle and a Troll

         born South of the Arctic Circle?

          A Northen Troll says    “God Morgen.”

          A Southern Troll says “God Morgen ,ya all.”

 

 


 

In October 2002 we had a Troll Joke Contest here at the Troll Collectors corner.  Below you will find the winning entry written by Master Trollologist Martin Calderwood.  Martin was also the winner of the Toll Limeric Contes.  

 

It is said that Trolls have a great sense of humor about themselves and their world. This humor is reflected in the creation of many words and phrases that sound a lot like the words we use but that have special meaning to Trolls. Here are a few samples. (Included with each is the ‘similar’ word the Trolls used.) Also included are a few ‘troll jokes’ at the end.

 

1) Con-troll: A Troll who wants to take charge of everything is said to be‘con-troll-ing. (control)

 

2) Ex-troll: When a Troll talks about him or herself or about another Troll and how good they are it is called ‘ex-troll-ing’ their virtues. (extol)

 

3) Troll-iday: Trolls celebrate many holidays like everyone else but there are also special days that only they celebrate called ‘Troll-idays’. (holiday)

 

4) Troll-dition: Something Trolls do every year or some special action or activity done regularly especially on ‘Trollidays’. (tradition)

 

5) Troll-erant: A Troll who has lots of patience (especially with humans) and who puts up with a lot of different things is said to be very ‘Troll-erant’. (tolerant)

 

6) Troll-drums: A Troll who is down or depressed is said to be "In the Troll-drums" (doldrums)

 

7) Pa-Troll: When one or more Trolls go out and check an area or to watch for problems they are on ‘Pa-Troll’. (patrol)

 

8) Troll-up: A Troll with loose actions or morals is called a Troll-up. (trollop)

 

9) Troll-doll: A really beautiful Troll is called a ‘Troll-doll’.

 

10) Ma-Troll-nal/Pa-Troll-nal: A mommy troll has ‘Ma-Troll-nal’ instincts. (maternal) And of course daddy trolls have ‘Pa-Troll-nal’ instincts. (paternal)

 

11) Troll-some: Any fun and growing activity young Trolls join in is said to be ‘Trollsome’. (wholesome)

 

12) Troll-tellite Dish: The thing Trolls have on their homes to help them watch Troll TV is a ‘Troll-talite’ Dish. (satellite dish)

 

13) Troll-ex: Either a Trolls favorite watch (or his former spouse) is called a ‘Troll-ex’ (Rolex)

 

14) Troll-egence: When a Troll gives his word to be a friend or to do something he or she are pledging their ‘Troll-egiance’. (allegiance)

 

15) Troll-ogy: Three books about Trolls (or even read by a Troll) are called a Troll-ogy. (trilogy)

 

 

Troll jokes: (all original in context if not in idea)

 

1)

Troll School Teacher: Okay Drog, use Norway, Sweden and Denmark in a sentence.

Drog: Okay, dar is Nor-vay yew can Sveden da coffee wit sugar and Denmark it as sour.

 

2)

Troll School Teacher: How does a Scottish Troll express gratitude fer da sheep he is ‘bout ta eat?

Jarg: Dat’s easy. He says ‘taks fer mutton’

 

 

3)

Troll School Teacher: Why should Trolls never us drugs?

Angh: Because Trolls don’t want to be stoned

 

 

4)

Troll Father: Vat is yer favorite type of music son?

Troll Son: Hard rock music of course.

 

 

5)

Troll Mother: I thought I told yew not ta listen ta dat religious music.

Troll Daughter: I know but vhen I heardit I fell in love wit it.

Troll Mother: And vat is da name of dis song?

Troll Daughter: Rock of Ages! It says ‘Rock of Ages Cliff fer me, let me hide myself in-dee’.


 

If you would like to share some troll humor with other troll entusiasts, send it to troll-joke@trollshop.net and we might publish it on this website. 

 

===> To the Troll Collector's Corner